I LIKE THE WORLD TODAY

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Not because of the madness swirling rampant (I'm in the mood to jump off that train) but because of its love and acceptance of 'fakeness'. The unreal. The buy it if you have the money to make the deal.

In my youth I had to learn to live with wearing wigs. In those days the hairpieces were not made for children (they were ugly)and no one was tolerant. I endured shots of some thing or other in my head and what I now know as radiation treatments for nothing. I spent my days being called names by family, friends, and foes alike. Now, everyone wears store bought hair and swirl it as if it is fastened with screws.

When I was younger I used to wear glasses. Cat glasses. The only one in the family to wear glasses. Imagine the ridicule. Now contacts have become my choice for clear vision. Some people have taken it to such a level they have even taken to change the color of their eyes. I wonder what God thinks when He looks in their faces and doubts His own creation.

Throughout my formative years I was the chunkie one. The no-colored, fat, bald headed one. Now, days some people use an out patient surgery corrects most of those problems. I quit like the idea of being no colored (in my mind)because everyone would have to find another reason for their prejudices.

When my (always long & beautiful)nails stopped growing on their own I ventured into the nearest salon and voila', my hands became a thing of beauty. I started eating better and they are now growing on their own again.

On any given day I berate myself for the self loathing and envy I used to feel when comparing myself to other females. If I had known then what I know now, I would probably be a different person. I would more than likely not have the ability to show compassion for others. I wouldn't have had the experience of dealing with ridicule and would have been unable to school my daughters to be tolerant and lovable.If I had been born not knowing my defects (as some never see their own)I would have thought I was perfect and everyone else defected.

3 comments:

Holli said... Best Blogger Tips

I understand how you feel to some degree... Right now, I'm struggling with my appearance and body post-pregnancy. Before kids, I felt confident and never worried about my appearance. Now, I'm riddled with self-doubt and insecurities. But, when I think about my struggles, I realize that it's made me more understanding and compassionate to people I might not have ever thought about. I think we go through things in life to expand our perspective and open us up to the journey God would have us take. While the journey can be painful, it's worth it in the end.

Loving myself before my insecurities arose was easy. Loving myself afterwards was more difficult but definitely feels like a truer, more genuine feeling - one I'll carry with me for eternity. When you fight for something it becomes more valuable.

The Voice said... Best Blogger Tips

Too true. Life began when I learned to like myself.

Debra Harris-Johnson said... Best Blogger Tips

I have never really let my looks dominate how I felt about myself. I had a gap when I was young and I thought everyone stared at it. I found out after I had it fixed no one realized I had a gap. I am letting my hair grow long again but to my amazement I have a baldspot in the front. Now that should bother me but it doesn't. If I told you younger ladies about some of the things that is about to happen to your body you would start screaming right at your computer station. I guess in the end you do come to terms with the truth...it really matters very little what you look like on the outside. AND if your looks really bother you, you can glue hair in, suck fat out, lift those breasts to high heaven, buy 20-20 vision whatever your pleasure. But the inside is what matters and you can not change that!

Those Feeling My Voice